Here we are, Tuesday noon, Jack and I, halfway through Iowa, Tim and Pops somewhere near Omaha, Steve and Larry on I-88 somewhere, John and Randy already at the camp in the Black Hills and Screamin' Bill still in his driveway, when we get the word that the Challenge has been canceled due to fire danger. The USFS prohibited any off-road travel in the Black Hills although they did not restrict camping! I wonder how many fires over the years have been started by campers and how many by wheelers? Hmmm! Our tax dollars in action - again.
Well, the cellular phones went into action. I'm on the phone with Connie, Steve calls me (although I don't know it's him), I try to switch to him, loose him, go back to Connie, she gets beeped, we hang up, I try to call Steve, who by now is talking to Connie (hence the beep) -- well you get the idea. So that's how the 2000 DTC in Moab, Utah, began.
After many calls among the Boyz on the road (whose cell phones were getting marginal service at best), using a plethora of four letter words to describe our predicament, Steve finally said " F**k it - let's go to Moab! " Our collective response, of course, a resounding " OK. " We decided to meet outside the airport at Grand Junction. We were all separated by about 3 hours one way or another (except for Bill who stayed in his driveway), so we figured we had a plan.
The Boyz from Illinoiz met up in Grand Junction about 8AM Wednesday. It wasn't
easy since Woodpecker said we should meet at the Ramada Inn by the vacant
lot next to the airport. Too bad that it was a Motel 6 instead. This snafu
was prophetic of more things to come from Woodpecker. Tim and Pops also had
the luxury of renting a room at the Ramada for a whole 4 hours! While there,
we had breakfast and the waitress inquired
"
Where are you from?
"
"
We're the Boyz from Illinoiz
"
was the response.
"
Where are you headed?
"
asked the waitress. As if choreographed, all 8 of us responded with the same
answer at the same time:
"
South Dakota!
"
She just shook her head.
So we wound up in Moab for the 2000 DTC for five days and did Lion's Back, Hell's Revenge, Upper Helldorado, Lower Helldorado, Metal Masher, Kane Creek, and Fins 'n' Things as well as a lot of sightseeing.
Wednesday, after we got settled, we did Lion's Back and Hell's Revenge. This was an anomaly as we started at 3 PM and finished before dark. Obviously we did something wrong. We did manage to spend a few hours at Eddie McStiff's, eating, drinking beer and coming up with a T-shirt design for the " Boyz from Illinoiz 2000 Whirlwind Tour of the West. " You may want to ask Larry about his white knuckles on the way down from Lion's back. I hear he even has a video of them!
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Thursday we got an early start - noon. We headed 10 miles south of Moab
to the Helldorados. We blew through lower in half an hour (yes we did!)
Upper, however, kicked our butts a little (ok, - a LOT) more. Even
before the 15-foot waterfall at the end where you have to winch, we
all winched once. John had a bad day with a lot of help from Woodpecker.
Seems that on the rock that's the size of a full-size Dodge, John bent
his tie rod. After trying to winch to some rocks and moving the rocks,
(rather than his TJ), we finally got him to level ground. So then Woodpeckers
says,
"
Let's put your new winch cable around the tie rod to straighten it.
"
"
OK
"
, replied John.
John starts to run the cable in while Woodpecker watches the tie rod. Unfortunately, no one was watching the cable and it rubbed on the sharp bottom of the roller housing mount and " ping " went John's new cable. Remember the mandatory 15-foot vertical winch point at the end of the trail? Well, John was less than happy but took it exceedingly well. We cut the frayed cable with a very, very dull chisel, made a new loop on the end and all was better. That night, (at 11 PM), John is still under the TJ at the motel welding supports on his tie rod (nice entertainment, John) and correcting his 3 " toe in on his spare tie rod with a 48 " pipe wrench while someone else, who shall remain nameless, finished his 88th ounce of Jalapeno Pepper beer. Gawd, this is fun! Oh, did I mention a lot of us got sunburned...... |
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Friday we headed out to the Poison Spider and the Golden Spike. After viewing the Indian petroglyphs and dinosaur tracks, we played on the Wedgie and a number of other obstacles on the Spider. A hike to Little Arch and the view of the entrance to Moab Rim from 1500' above the ground was spectacular. The Spike was fun, as always, but it did claim a 27 year old rear axle in Steve's CJ. Our suggestion was that Steve and Larry could rent a Sammy and we'd really have fun tomorrow. Yes, that's Pops hanging on for dear life. He couldn't even say " Ohhhh Shiiiitt! " All that came out of him was a high pitched whine that's really hard to describe. Ask him! |
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Saturday Steve rented a 2000 TJ. Back at the motel, we quickly removed the sway bar, added a front tow hook (which was needed later), removed the doors, pulled some fuses, aired down from 60 to 20 psi and put in a CB and antenna, courtesy of Pops. Oh yes, Steve also packed the complimentary water and cooler. No - this isn't a traffic stop on the trail. We're just trying to see if we can tip Steve's rent-a-Jeep over. |
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On to Metal Masher. Woodpecker did a number on the group, similar to Calamity Canyon, in April. In other words, he took 17 wrong turns and had the group lost for 2-3 hours. Finally, he said " Shoot, we're at the end of Metal Masher. Let's run it backwards and then forwards. " This would have been a good plan except that he couldn't even find the trail backwards and wound up doing a mile and a half hike before he found the trail. Once found, we went down the canyon to Mirror Gulch. At Rock Chucker, John and Woodpecker made it up, Steve with the rent-a-TJ, made it halfway! Then we went back up the canyon. Steve didn't have to strap or winch once, but did create a lot of entertainment in the process. |
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We wound up at Widow Maker and after some laughing, winching and a lot of smoke from Steve's stock tires, we got up and went on. We stopped at Dead Horse Point to view the scenery and were surely not disappointed! Then we returned through Long Canyon and right at Pucker Pass, where the trail twists and turns, John lost his steering. He found that a bolt fell out. Woodpecker had one and gave it to John in a feeble attempt to redeem his trashing of John's winch cable, and we continued on. Tim, who had problems with his rear lockout, could only do 30 mph otherwise it got so hot you could fry and egg - and then some. We got back, Steve got his " highly modified " TJ for another day, we ate, and got ready for the 'morrow, Kane Creek. |
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Sunday, our last day. John had to leave - bye John! Tim trashed his rear lockout hub so he rented - yup - a TJ. Once again, a few " modifications " and we were off to Kane Creek, with one kick-ass Jeep (mine of course) and two TJs. We no sooner got on the trail than the kick-ass Jeep broke. A bolt fell out of the transmission mount and the remaining one sheared off. After scouring the YJ and both TJs for a 7/16 (no spare was available), we found one on the bell housing that didn't appear to be critical. By then, a group behind us caught up and they had a second one. Two hours later, we all made it up the hill at the end with no problems at all from the TJs. |
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A driver's meeting at the end of the trail determined a trip up to the La Sals and Oowah and Warner Lakes would be in order. The kick-ass YJ had a very tough time negotiating the 8-10% 8 mile grade! Once again, the stock TJs worked great. We came back on Sand Flats road and with only three hours to go before the TJs turned into pumpkins (they had to be returned by 7PM) so we, of course, chose to do the north half of Fins-n-Things. What a great time. Once again, with major tire squealing, smoke, rubber burning and Tim's laugh, we got through in a about an hour. Back to the motel and it was a mad frenzy to put all the parts, doors, fuses, etc. back where they belonged. |
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We all had a great time: 9.9 on a scale of 1 to 10 (and there ain't no 10s.) The TJs worked so well, and Steve and Tim had so much fun with them, we talked about us all going back again without our Jeeps, renting a bunch of TJs and going wheeling for a week! One never knows, so stay tuned for the further adventures from the " Boyz from Illinoiz " !
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Created 09/13/00.
Last Modified: |
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